On the way back from Costa Rica I land in Miami. As I'm entering customs I realize that the line is gonna take FOREVER!!! It is MASSIVELY LONG!!! So while contemplating about how miserable I'm gonna be in this line I glance over to my left and see a sign:
"HANDICAPPED INDIVIDUALS AND THOSE WHO NEED ASSISTANCE"
There is nobody there, not one person waiting in this area where I'm sure there is hardly ever a line.
The wheels in my head start turning.
I limp over to the lady near the line, dragging my right leg behind me.
Me: Excuse me, ma'am.
Lady: Yessir
Me: I injured my knee recently. Is there anyway I could possibly use this line?
Lady: WHY OF COURSE SWEETIE! Here, let me help you. You just walk right this way and you can see this gentlemen here, he will help you out.
I wait 2 minutes for the customs guy to finish with his current individual, then I step in, ahead of EVERYONE. That's right, I don't see my own customs guy, I get to CUT THE LINE, in front of ALLLLLLLL the people who have been waiting FOREVVVVVVER!! As I finish up with customs I drag my leg behind me for what seemed like an eternity until I turn the corner and exit into the next room...where I immediately haul ass to my connecting flight.
LOL..
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
Monday, November 26, 2012
Cookbook Runbad
Go to book store to buy cookbook for our house lady so we can have delish lunches from now on. Spend 25-30min looking through the 200 or so books at bookstore. Decide on a book about chicken. Get back to house, go to kitchen to put book in obscure cabinet that we never use. Open cabinet to find it almost empty aside from THE EXACT SAME GODDAMN COOKBOOK I JUST BOUGHT!!! WHAT ARE THE ODDS!!!?
Dammit.
Dammit.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Funny Poker Hit and Run Story
So I'm playing this guy named Synt3x on stars at $1/$2 and was putting a pretty severe beatdown on him. After I stack him for the final time he SNAP leaves the table. He must not have been very happy. A couple of minutes go by and I continue to play some other players. I win and lose a few small pots here and there, Nick quits for the day after a great comeback from being stuck earlier, my other roommate Jason loses a $1,600 pot all-in preflop where his AQ loses to some guy who calls his all-in shove with Q9 on the first hand (wow, lol). Jason is now pretty livid and bitching up a storm.
So after a couple of minutes my friend Synt3x returns and buys back in. So I welcome him back...
Me: "Oh, you decided to give it another shot, welcome back".
Synt3x: "Yeah, I just won $800 in one hand!"
Me: "Really? What stakes? That's sick."
Synt3x: "$10/$20"
After processing the fact that this terrible player actually went and sat $10/$20, I realize this may actually have been the same guy that min-3bet Jason and spaz called off Q9 for $800 dollars! So I ask Jason the name of the player that sucked out on him and sure enough it was my opponent Synt3x, lol. This guy took a huge beatdown from me, must have stormed off completely irate, sat Jason at $10/$20, picked up Q9 and 3bet preflop vs Jason's raise, then when Jason shoved for $800 he must have (in a completely fed-up fit of psychotic anger) said "FUCK IT!!!" and clicked the call button and sucked out on my roommate for the $1,600 pot! LOLOL. Poor Jason. Then he comes back and loses another buyin to me (of Jason's money, lol).
I started typing and chatting with Syntex telling him that it was my roommate sitting right next to me who he sucked out on. He didn't believe it at first, but after I told him how the hand played out he was typing up a storm of "LOL"s. He told me to tell Jason that he was sorry. He also said that he clicked the call button and just got up and walked away from his computer and didn't even look at the screen.
LOL. Crazy.
So after a couple of minutes my friend Synt3x returns and buys back in. So I welcome him back...
Me: "Oh, you decided to give it another shot, welcome back".
Synt3x: "Yeah, I just won $800 in one hand!"
Me: "Really? What stakes? That's sick."
Synt3x: "$10/$20"
After processing the fact that this terrible player actually went and sat $10/$20, I realize this may actually have been the same guy that min-3bet Jason and spaz called off Q9 for $800 dollars! So I ask Jason the name of the player that sucked out on him and sure enough it was my opponent Synt3x, lol. This guy took a huge beatdown from me, must have stormed off completely irate, sat Jason at $10/$20, picked up Q9 and 3bet preflop vs Jason's raise, then when Jason shoved for $800 he must have (in a completely fed-up fit of psychotic anger) said "FUCK IT!!!" and clicked the call button and sucked out on my roommate for the $1,600 pot! LOLOL. Poor Jason. Then he comes back and loses another buyin to me (of Jason's money, lol).
I started typing and chatting with Syntex telling him that it was my roommate sitting right next to me who he sucked out on. He didn't believe it at first, but after I told him how the hand played out he was typing up a storm of "LOL"s. He told me to tell Jason that he was sorry. He also said that he clicked the call button and just got up and walked away from his computer and didn't even look at the screen.
LOL. Crazy.
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Robbed at Gunpoint
Awesome night. Made a G on the grind, had an amazing meal at Praha, and then got robbed at gunpoint.
Myself and 4 other poker players go to this really nice restaurant to eat called Praha. After dinner we walked to the road just 20ft from the restaurant with tons of people everywhere behind us when two guys on a moped stop and ask us if we know where Del Rey apartments are. As we're telling these guys that we have no idea where these apartments are, the guy on the back of the bike inconspicuously pulls out a gun, demands our phones and our money, snap grabs everything out of our front pockets and they take off.
This literally happened in a matter of 10 seconds in front of an open air restaurant with people everywhere.
When he demanded my phone I told him "No tengo". I don't have a Costa Rican cellphone yet and I usually never take my iPhone out with me. Lucky for me he didn't check my back pockets, I forgot that I had brought my iPhone to the restaurant to take some pictures. Unfortunately, I knew we were gonna play credit card roulette at the end of dinner for the bill so I had $200 cash on me.
The funny thing is that whenever I walk to the grocery store here, I always keep $20 in my pocket and put my large bills in my cigarette pack. If I was on the way to the store when this happened the robber would have pocketed $20 and then handed me back a cigarette pack full of large bills. I woulda had a good laugh at that.
Unfortunately, that didn't happen.
So after all this, my friend's girlfriend (a Costa Rican girl) came over to his place and we told her what happened. We also spoke with our security guard and after listening to them tell stories and asking them if it was safe just to walk 3minutes down the hill to the grocery store, we found out just how insanely dangerous Costa Rica is. Even where we are in Escazu, the NICEST area of San Jose (it would be like Alpharetta, Georgia), you shouldn't be out at night. This motorbike style robbery is totally normal and it's not uncommon for people to get shot if they have no money or refuse in any way.
Apparently, earlier this year, my friend's girlfriend took a cab with her boyfriend and a couple of our other friends to her place to get some things from her house before heading back to his place. As she walked inside a group of guys pull up in a car and wait for her to come back outside. As she comes outside they hop out of the car and start quickly walking toward her to rob her then they stop because they see that the cab is full of guys and I guess they didn't have guns and didn't want to get into a brawl.
Keep in mind that this is Escazu. This is THE NICEST AREA of San Jose!
I found out that even our regular cab driver, Tomas, got robbed while jogging during the day a few weeks ago. A Tico jacked him for his iPod and whatever else he had on him.
We live in a complex with just 4 houses and our place is gated with razor wire all around it, we pay for a 24/7 armed security guard who regularly patrols the grounds with a flashlight, and all of our neighbor's complexes are the exact same. I used to think it was overkill on the security, but not after hearing stories from these locals. And like I said, we live in the nicest area in San Jose. There's a Maserati dealership nearby and we see Ferraris when we walk down to the shops! That's how nice of an area we are in! And it's still not safe to walk outside your complex at night! There are other stories that I could share but they aren't nearly as common and I don't want to scare the hell out of my parents.
There's a saying the Ticos have here: "The good people live in houses that look like prisons (because of the bars on the windows, gates, fences topped with razor wire, metal doors, alarms, padlocks, etc) and the criminals roam the streets freely." I can tell you from being here, that is completely accurate and not an exaggeration. At least the weather is nice.
Myself and 4 other poker players go to this really nice restaurant to eat called Praha. After dinner we walked to the road just 20ft from the restaurant with tons of people everywhere behind us when two guys on a moped stop and ask us if we know where Del Rey apartments are. As we're telling these guys that we have no idea where these apartments are, the guy on the back of the bike inconspicuously pulls out a gun, demands our phones and our money, snap grabs everything out of our front pockets and they take off.
This literally happened in a matter of 10 seconds in front of an open air restaurant with people everywhere.
When he demanded my phone I told him "No tengo". I don't have a Costa Rican cellphone yet and I usually never take my iPhone out with me. Lucky for me he didn't check my back pockets, I forgot that I had brought my iPhone to the restaurant to take some pictures. Unfortunately, I knew we were gonna play credit card roulette at the end of dinner for the bill so I had $200 cash on me.
The funny thing is that whenever I walk to the grocery store here, I always keep $20 in my pocket and put my large bills in my cigarette pack. If I was on the way to the store when this happened the robber would have pocketed $20 and then handed me back a cigarette pack full of large bills. I woulda had a good laugh at that.
Unfortunately, that didn't happen.
So after all this, my friend's girlfriend (a Costa Rican girl) came over to his place and we told her what happened. We also spoke with our security guard and after listening to them tell stories and asking them if it was safe just to walk 3minutes down the hill to the grocery store, we found out just how insanely dangerous Costa Rica is. Even where we are in Escazu, the NICEST area of San Jose (it would be like Alpharetta, Georgia), you shouldn't be out at night. This motorbike style robbery is totally normal and it's not uncommon for people to get shot if they have no money or refuse in any way.
Apparently, earlier this year, my friend's girlfriend took a cab with her boyfriend and a couple of our other friends to her place to get some things from her house before heading back to his place. As she walked inside a group of guys pull up in a car and wait for her to come back outside. As she comes outside they hop out of the car and start quickly walking toward her to rob her then they stop because they see that the cab is full of guys and I guess they didn't have guns and didn't want to get into a brawl.
Keep in mind that this is Escazu. This is THE NICEST AREA of San Jose!
I found out that even our regular cab driver, Tomas, got robbed while jogging during the day a few weeks ago. A Tico jacked him for his iPod and whatever else he had on him.
We live in a complex with just 4 houses and our place is gated with razor wire all around it, we pay for a 24/7 armed security guard who regularly patrols the grounds with a flashlight, and all of our neighbor's complexes are the exact same. I used to think it was overkill on the security, but not after hearing stories from these locals. And like I said, we live in the nicest area in San Jose. There's a Maserati dealership nearby and we see Ferraris when we walk down to the shops! That's how nice of an area we are in! And it's still not safe to walk outside your complex at night! There are other stories that I could share but they aren't nearly as common and I don't want to scare the hell out of my parents.
There's a saying the Ticos have here: "The good people live in houses that look like prisons (because of the bars on the windows, gates, fences topped with razor wire, metal doors, alarms, padlocks, etc) and the criminals roam the streets freely." I can tell you from being here, that is completely accurate and not an exaggeration. At least the weather is nice.
Sunday, June 10, 2012
Living in Costa Rica!!!
As promised, I'm going to try and start blogging again. Can't believe it's been over 8 months since I'd written a post. Alright, where to start...
So if you're reading this blog you probably know that I've chosen to move to Costa Rica to continue playing online poker. Everyone seems to be super excited for me because "Costa Rica is awesome", "the beaches there are amazing", "you're going to have so much fun"...in reality though, I came down here for one reason and one reason only: To make a lot of money.
I've been here for 5 days now and all I've done is played poker. Not all that exciting. Well, we did have la policia called on us once already I guess. I'm living with my friend Nick and our buddy Jason in a small complex with four houses on a hillside just outside San Jose. Two of the other three houses are full of poker players, so it's sort of a poker community.
A few of the characters here:
Neal: I don't know him very well, but he lives in one of the houses and comes over occasionally. From what I've heard, he grinds super small stakes tournaments (like $2 buyin, 180man Sit-n-goes...how this works i have no idea) and does not make very much money. I think he's actually going home soon.
Matt: Lives in the house across from us. He plays tourneys online and has made a couple of $5,000+ scores in the few days I've been here (good job Matt). Matt is the only poker player in the complex who is relatively fluent in Spanish and he has a Costa Rican girlfriend who doesn't speak English. Hells yeah!
Gaz: Apparently, there's a guy named Gaz here who I haven't met yet. From what I've heard, Gaz is Austrian, has a funny accent, smokes a ton of weed, and is hilarious (looking forward to meeting this guy, lol).
Paul: Paul is our landlord. He's a sketchy fat old biker lookin' guy who invited Nick and Jason to lunch the first week they were here at a restaurant/casino/bar full of hookers.
Tomas: Our go-to cab driver. Speaks English alright and is super nice and helpful. Always wears a New York Yankees ballcap.
Andrew: A poker player who lives further in the city. He has a penthouse to himself with the sickest view of San Jose (pics coming eventually). Inside he is installing a stripper pole for his Costa Rican ex-stripper slam piece that I'm not sure is or is not his girlfriend, lol.
I could write about a few more things, but I'll save them for later since it's 5am and I need to get to bed. Pics and stories coming soon :)
So if you're reading this blog you probably know that I've chosen to move to Costa Rica to continue playing online poker. Everyone seems to be super excited for me because "Costa Rica is awesome", "the beaches there are amazing", "you're going to have so much fun"...in reality though, I came down here for one reason and one reason only: To make a lot of money.
I've been here for 5 days now and all I've done is played poker. Not all that exciting. Well, we did have la policia called on us once already I guess. I'm living with my friend Nick and our buddy Jason in a small complex with four houses on a hillside just outside San Jose. Two of the other three houses are full of poker players, so it's sort of a poker community.
A few of the characters here:
Neal: I don't know him very well, but he lives in one of the houses and comes over occasionally. From what I've heard, he grinds super small stakes tournaments (like $2 buyin, 180man Sit-n-goes...how this works i have no idea) and does not make very much money. I think he's actually going home soon.
Matt: Lives in the house across from us. He plays tourneys online and has made a couple of $5,000+ scores in the few days I've been here (good job Matt). Matt is the only poker player in the complex who is relatively fluent in Spanish and he has a Costa Rican girlfriend who doesn't speak English. Hells yeah!
Gaz: Apparently, there's a guy named Gaz here who I haven't met yet. From what I've heard, Gaz is Austrian, has a funny accent, smokes a ton of weed, and is hilarious (looking forward to meeting this guy, lol).
Paul: Paul is our landlord. He's a sketchy fat old biker lookin' guy who invited Nick and Jason to lunch the first week they were here at a restaurant/casino/bar full of hookers.
Tomas: Our go-to cab driver. Speaks English alright and is super nice and helpful. Always wears a New York Yankees ballcap.
Andrew: A poker player who lives further in the city. He has a penthouse to himself with the sickest view of San Jose (pics coming eventually). Inside he is installing a stripper pole for his Costa Rican ex-stripper slam piece that I'm not sure is or is not his girlfriend, lol.
I could write about a few more things, but I'll save them for later since it's 5am and I need to get to bed. Pics and stories coming soon :)
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